female blowing a kiss in the winter and you can see her breath

On January 28, it was Bell’s Let’s Talk day. Especially during the pandemic, it important that we check-in on each other. So, here’s my pandemic check-in with you.

I saw a stream of stories, struggles, and successes pop up all around me that day. Although mental health remains a taboo topic, I do not shy away from talking about it. I guess this blog is my outlet to share my thoughts, and strategies that have served me, in the hopes that I am doing my part.

We do not need only one day to talk about mental health, we need to talk about it every day.

Especially during this lengthy pandemic, it has become essential to reach out to our communities and support system, and simply check in. To genuinely ask “how are you” and hope that the answer is just as sincere. If you think about it, that might be the only social interaction that person has all day. So, make it count.

How are you?

Close your eyes. Take a deep breath. What feelings come up for you?

It is ok to feel strongly, or to feel numb. Feelings are normal. The situation we find ourselves in is not normal. The more we tap into the acceptance of how we are feeling, the more we accept the unprecedented circumstances we are living each day as abnormal.

My life has not been “normal” in almost 2 years. When my husband got diagnosed with cancer, my “normal” changed in that moment, and I had to grieve it because it was never coming back. Whatever “normal” I am headed towards is different from anything that I have known up until now.

I have learned to open myself up to the promise that new normal can bring and find power in the fact that it is a blank page. I get to fill it with whatever I want – and no one else controls that but me.

What I control

I am the keeper of my own future. But there are many things that are out of my control right now that have a deep impact on how my normal is coming along. That is unsettling, but it is part of the picture.

A big part of how I approach the topic of control is accepting the things I do not have any control over and letting them go. This has been the hardest lesson to learn because we are conditioned to think that we control more than we do.

For example, how do others treat us? We have no control over that. Could it be a reaction to something we did? Absolutely… but there are different ways people can react, and that is out of our control, and wholly on the other person.

This simple example is easy for me to say now but working through the different instances in life where I felt I needed to have control, and for some reason I didn’t, was very difficult. Learning to let go of the things I did not control was a game-changer for me.

What you do control

As you read through my blog posts, I suggest mindsets and tools that have helped me. There are so many resources out there, and I tend to cover the tips and tools that have worked for me. This does not mean that it will work for you, too.

I encourage you to take hold of what you can control and look for solutions that help you manage your own challenges best. I invite you to leave here in this moment what does not serve you. And, at the end of the day, ask yourself… How are you?

If you need someone to talk to about your life and career challenges, get in touch with me. I’m happy to help you.